Have you ever:
- Asked someone else what you should do.
- Thought you didn’t know the answer.
- Thought you didn’t know how to do something.
- Struggle with which option to choose.
- Wished there was a clear right answer.
- Doubted your decisions.
All of that is a lack of certainty
Sometimes others seem so certain,
While we struggle with uncertainty and doubt.
But certainty can be a learned skill.
My father had lots of certainty.
So do my brother and sister.
Yet, for most of my life, I lack certainty.
In my later years, though I have learned how to be certain.
And so can you.
Here is how:
- First deal with any issues or thoughts from your past.
- Past experiences and thoughts about those experiences hinder certainty.
- So, clean up your thoughts about your past.
I don’t mean:
- Pretend those things didn’t happen.
- Just forget about it.
- Just think positive
I mean do the healing work of:
- Noticing your thoughts.
- Examining your thoughts and the impact they have on your life.
- Letting go of those disempowering thoughts.
- Finally, choose and practice new empowering thoughts.
It is hard to have certainty when your brain is full of thoughts that:
- Hold onto anger and resentment.
- Blame or shame yourself or others.
- Keep you feeling like you were victimized.
- Hold onto regrets.
So, you have to clean all of that up first.
I believe this is why I lacked certainty for so long.
But the more I worked on cleaning up my thoughts,
- Certain I became.
- Calm I became.
- The more focused and directed I became.
Here’s the thing:
There is no right answer!
That’s because the right answer is different for everybody.
Someone else’s right answer is not your right answer.
But you can’t find your right answer if you lack certainty.
Certainty is the ability to:
- Think for yourself.
- Evaluate the results/process without blaming yourself or others.
- Create time in your day so you can think.
- Realize your answers are right for you not others.
- Realize other’s answers aren’t right for you.
- Be ok with your answers.
- Change what can be changed.
- Accept and make peace with what can’t be changed.
- Not live as a victim.
- Not blame others.
- Take full responsibility for the outcome.
- Being authentic while letting others be themselves.
All of that is certainty.
And all of it is something you can learn to become.
If you would like help learning the skill of certainty, just click: Schedule My Consultation With Cindy
I will help you!