For 3 decades after my abuse stopped, I thought and said:
- It’s just how I am because I was abused.
- I’m just more sensitive than others.
- I get scared easily.
- I am not the problem, other people are.
I also wondered why I didn’t have the life I wanted.
This last sentence might make you laugh.
Reading the above sentences, the answer might be obvious to you.
Or it might not be.
It is obvious to me now.
But it wasn’t obvious all those years ago.
The answer to why I didn’t have the life I wanted is:
I was trying to create my life from my past thoughts as a victim.
That’s the thing about any kind of abuse (or trauma).
We are told things during the abuse.
We told ourselves things about why we were abused.
We did things to survive during the abuse.
All of that is what happened in the past.
A lot of what we had to do, and think was necessary.
It is what kept us safe.
It is how we survived.
However, the thoughts and behaviors that worked during our abuse,
Don’t work now.
Often in our current life, we don’t realize:
We are acting from old thoughts and behaviors.
It is like trying to drive a Model T on the Interstate at 60 mph.
It just doesn’t work.
But we don’t even realize we are driving a Model T.
We just don’t understand why we can’t go 60 mph.
We just don’t understand why our life isn’t working.
It’s time to upgrade or shift your thinking.
The Model T is your old victim thinking.
I want you to upgrade your thinking to a modern car.
Or Creation Thinking.
It is not your fault that you are using old victim thinking.
You didn’t know any better.
Chances are you don’t even notice these old victim thoughts.
First, you have to become aware of your old victim thoughts.
Before you can change to new creation thoughts.
You can’t slap new thoughts on top of old thoughts.
You actually have to choose to stop thinking the old thoughts.
In order to do that you need to notice:
- The old thoughts that you are still thinking.
- How the old thoughts are affecting your life.
Then you can consciously choose to let go of the old thoughts.
And choose new thoughts to think.
There is an old saying:
You can’t make a silk purse from a sow’s ear.
In other words, you can’t create a life of:
- Loving relationships
- Satisfying career
From thoughts and feelings about:
I encourage you to begin to notice your old victim thoughts.
Notice the impact they are having on your life.
Then consciously choose to replace them with creation thinking.
A great way to start doing this is to daily do:
- A Thought Download
- A Model
I have given instructions is past blogs on how to do these.
Just search for Thought Download and The Model.
If you would like help notice and changing your thinking, just click: Schedule My Consultation With Cindy
I will help you!