So often as survivors of sexual abuse we think we have compartmentalized our abuse. We think it is in the past. We don’t even realize that how we treat ourselves (and others) could be being influenced by our abuse. This doesn’t make us bad or wrong. It just means that by noticing how we treat ourselves (and others) we can begin to create the change we so desire in our lives. It is easy to blame our perpetrator. Clearly what they did was not ok! We didn’t ask to be sexually assaulted. In fact, at the time of our abuse, we were powerless to do anything different. Now, though, we are not powerless. We can choose to notice, without blaming ourselves, how what happened to us could be affecting our lives now. With noticing comes the opportunity to choose a new way. A way that allows us to have the life we truly want.
Here are some questions to help you begin to notice if your abuse is affecting your life now:
- How do you dress? Why do you dress this way?
- How do you think and feel about your body?
- How do you react to work, social and family pressure?
- How do you handle yourself emotionally?
- Do you deal with stress by overdrinking, over-drugging, overeating, over-spending, zoning out on social media, gambling, over-sleeping, avoiding others or other forms of numbing out? Why or why not?
- How is your self-esteem and your relationship with yourself?
- Do you blame your life now on your abuse?
- How would you like your life to go?
- What is keeping your life from going the way you want it to go?
If you would like help freeing yourself from your abuse and creating the life you want, simply schedule a free complimentary coaching session with me at: www.CindysCalendar.com